If you just got a new roommate or currently have a roommate, it's a good idea to have some type of roommate agreement to follow some basic rules in your household. These rules can range everywhere from household chores to financial arrangements-you decide.
Either way, some type of roommate agreement is beneficial and can lead to less confrontations once some basic ground rules are established.
Either way, some type of roommate agreement is beneficial and can lead to less confrontations once some basic ground rules are established.
Roommate Agreement Terms
If at all possible, it's a nice idea if you and your roommate can work up a roommate agreement together. Topics such as rent terms, breaking the lease, living space, cleaning, guests and more can all be included within your agreement.
You can have this agreement written down on paper where all parties sign to it or it can be verbal. The key for a roommate agreement to successfully work is to make sure the agreement is respected, followed and enforced by all roommates.
Personally, I think topics involving the daily living aspect with roommates are the most important part of a roommate agreement and it should be clearly outlined and defined.
You can have this agreement written down on paper where all parties sign to it or it can be verbal. The key for a roommate agreement to successfully work is to make sure the agreement is respected, followed and enforced by all roommates.
Personally, I think topics involving the daily living aspect with roommates are the most important part of a roommate agreement and it should be clearly outlined and defined.
Rent terms and financial obligations are a given and you would be a fool NOT to discuss these terms when living with a complete stranger or even your best friend.
Some of the biggest problems I've encountered with roommates wasn't over money, which basically is what the "rent terms and financial obligations" are all about, but over household chores, guests, noise, living space, personal items and food if you could believe that.
This is the basic everyday "living" part that sometimes can lead to more confrontations than arguments over money.
"Living With Roommates"
To make everyday living with roommates easier, discuss these topics up front and openly to avoid shouting matches with your roommate:
Household Chores
Guess what? Household Chores
"Your mama doesn't live here!"
Divide chores and see to it that all parties do their part. Sounds silly, but do you always want to be the one to take out the garbage every night or have to come home to a sink full of soiled dishes?
You and your roommate are adults and as adults, you should be mature and responsible enough to clean up after yourself.
Guests
A guest here and there is usually not a problem, but what if your roommate has a significant other?
Are you comfortable with their significant other always spending the night at your place, especially if they eat up all the food and make a mess? What if your roommate moves their significant other in without telling you?
Are you guys going to split the rent three ways or are you going to make them move? Make sure the topic of boyfriends and girlfriends are discussed thoroughly and completely. I've seen one too many fights on this topic where one roommate usually ends up breaking the the lease and moving out.
Noise
Do you or your roommate have a tendency to play music really loud? It may not be a problem during the day, but what if your roommate does this at 2am?
A simple agreement like turning down the stereo at 10pm or 11pm is more than fair and courteous.
Personal Items
Hey, did your roommate say you can borrow that jacket? Sometimes people you meet can appear so sweet and friendly, but as soon as you touch their thing, they can become real nasty.
Before borrowing anything from your roommate or your roommate borrowing anything from you, make sure it's ok.
This includes borrowing CDs, DVDs, the computer, clothes, jewelry, heck even a pen (especially if it's removed off the computer desk). ASK, ASK, ASK!
Living Space
Most of the space in your apartment will be shared, but sometimes you may find a situation where you or your roommate will get very particular about personal space.
For instance, some people are very sensitive about people going into their bedroom. I've even seen people lock their bedroom when they leave the house because they are that serious about privacy and their space.
In general you shouldn't be going into anyone's bedroom and vice versa. Just to make sure you don't snap at your roommate or you don't get snapped at, discuss topics about privacy and space to see where the boundaries should be drawn.
Food
In my household, one of the roommate agreements is to split the grocery bill three ways because we don't want to get into the habit where one person screams "That juice is mine!" or "Who ate all my yogurt?"
However, some people wish to have food only for themselves and don't like or want to share, especially if they paid for it. Sounds unimportant, but discuss whether or not you and your roommate will do grocery shopping together or separately.
If it is separate, designate shelves in the refrigerator for you and for your roommate. If there comes a time when you would like to eat something your roommate bought, ask first.
However, don't be surprised if they say no. If you know your roommate is petty and selfish to actually say no, offer to replace the item the next day.
Conflicts
They're unavoidable if you have roommates.
To help resolve some of the smaller issues that arise, sit down with your roommate and have a house meeting to reinforce some of the rules. Household meetings should always be apart of your roommate agreement because it's a great way for you and your roommate to solve problems together.
The silent treatment act just won't work if there is a problem and it will only cause tension in your household.
Therefore, as with any type of relationship, living with roommates is a give and take situation that requires compromise. If a problem aries that can't be resolved easily and maturely get a mediator to help, but whatever you do, don't let problems linger.
Roommate agreements are great and do work if everyone does their part. They don't have to be overly complicated or technical, just thorough enough so all parties understand the rules.
T.Bo
